Ships ahoy.

Aaaand back from the mandatory personel conference.
Which was, to say the least, informative both in the ways of man, the mechanics of a company and the short-lived joys brought by running round an Åland block screaming "I'm FREE! FINALLY FREE!"

Things started off peacefully enough, dinner, three glasses of wine, a snaps or two, a drink consisted of pear and cognac. And this was within the first hour I might add that the first evening, as you might ahve suspected, consisted of bonding. The sort of bonding which involved alcahol and a mornign after consisting of pndering why some idiot thought it a good idea to gather a whole bunch of people into a place that will, whether you like it or not, rock mercilessly, and then fill these people with copious amounts of alcahol.

later on, came the dnacing part of the evening. Now, if all of my freinds jumped off a mountain, I would probably stay behind and laugh. But when all my freinds get up to dance to Kikki Danielsson and her contemporaries, I get up and shake my booty. (The Power of Birka compells You! ) In order to shake your booty, you do, however need a dancing partner. Convincing yourself that you can have fun AND dance all by your damn well liberated woman of 2000-self feels just about as great as having dinner for one in a restaurant that has a two-for-one special tat particular evening

Which reminds me - the company is offering a two for one thing up till december. Which is just so damn depressing. The two for one ticket costs 99 crowns, leaving the price per person at 49:50. It thus seems natural to ask passengers if they have company, to save these good people some cash. But my heart sinks a little in the hopes that the rest of my body will follow it everytime a passenger looks down shame-facedly and mumbles "no. One. " I find it a bit cruel to sell single people tickets that cost twice as much as they would have, had the passenger had company. it feels like "Oh, you're lonely and desperate? Tough. You don't look like you've suffered enough though, despite your 80's poodle frizz. 89 crowns, please." My apologies to all the Eleanor Rigbys of this world, I love you all.

Right, dancing it was. Well. I have never been as skilled in social relations and the laws that govern them as I would like to be. Now, to my right, was a sturdy looking 33 year old man, who, though his pleasant face, lost points by sliding down next to me and hissing- "I'm a boxer. I have nooooo feeling in my right hand.". To my left, was one of the bosses, let's call him Ed. I chose Ed, a man I'd hardly talked to before, but who insists on wearing a new shirt everytime I see him, making me refuse him entry into my booth everytime he passes by, (seeing as how we are not supposed to allow strangers into our space) I've learnt his name by and by now, since he yelps a little eveytime I shun him and cries- "it's Me! Ed! Remember? Your boss!"

So here's Ed to my left.
I had had my fair share of tequilas, I had.
"ED" I say, pronouncing the name in such a way that it sounded like a story instead of one word. A threatening story, but a story all the same.
"ED." I repeated. "IF I WERE TO WANT TO DANCE, and asked you to dance with me, would you?"
"Yes?"
"Allright ED. Do YOU want ME to Ask YOU, ED to dance?"
"uuh, yes?"

That's right. Scare them into submission, ra ra ra.


My style of walking is directly proportionate to my discreetness in social matters.
is what one could say. Doesn't work that way in every situation, though. I'm painfully shy at times. At the conference itself, I was the only representative for our little 'section'. I will not tell the reader what section entails other than that it has everything to do with who sits in the little booth downstairs. It felt a bit cool though. I kept thinking of the Lord of the Rings when every kind of species is gathered round the table. I was the sole representative of the trolls downstairs, I was happy. Until I was posed a direct question.

Usually, when you have the morning shift, you hav a certain sum of money aailable to you until six am, when the others arrive. The discussion was about whether this sum lasted - during the time the morning-shift-person was alone - or not. "Is x amount of money and change enough to last you through the morning till the rest of the personel arrive?" - one of the bosses asks me. Me. I froze, like a deer in the headlights of a monstertruck. It was not pretty. Silence. I decide to buy time.

"Could you..repeat that, please?" In english of course, a dead give-away that I also felt like a deer in the headlights of a monstertruck. And there were fourteen in total sitting aroudn the table. Vroom vroom. "Is the amount of money enough to last you till the rest of the personell arrive in te morning?" he repeated. "Well...yes...?" (I coulcl totally relate to Ed right now, and cast several desperate glances in his direction) "I mean, if the money runs out, you just call the people upstairs, and they bring you more....? So yes, my answer is yes. Yes. Indeed. Haaaaauuum." It hits me two minutes afterwards that I never quite answered the question. If money runs out, there is no-one there to call before six, which was- the question in the first place. And I botched it, saying that I would call someone. Someone, who wouldn't be there. hey! Kudos to me and my imaginary workmates.

I wanted to sink through the floor. I picked up my pencil and started doodling in my hand a while before realising that it was a pencil and obviosly not something you use to doodle on your hand with Linda, my sweet, starting smoothing out my hair, and this made everything all right, somehow. She understood.

I almost fell asleep twice during the conference ( even though I thought it enchanting that to see people I appreciate all interact at the same time) - this because my breakfast mates had confused finnish and swedish time and dragged me out of bed at seven am, instead of te agreed on 9 am. I'd like to use this, and not the fact that I had a bit too much to drink the night before, to explain why teh bacon and eggs made a comeback after i'd gotten back to my cabin. There is, however, no explaining why lunch insisted on treating me to its cognacy taste again later on. Only the mazarin stayed, and this I am happy for as I am quite fond of mazariner.

All in all, it was a lovely experience. just hate that I missed CW10 because of it.
But to make a not so perfect day perfect, I rounded it off by heading over to Andreas place.
Andreas, whom I adore above all. Because I do.