SPICE UP MY LIFE!!!1
Hooray, the Spice Girls are coming back. Question is, does anyone remember the spice girls except for those two hit songs and that one movie that nobody saw unless they were eleven or high and mistook one salon for another (which resulted in a whole lot of proverbial "stealing candy from babies").
Well I for one remember the Spice girls. Not for their songs though, but for other random nonsense - something which seems to sum up the entire affair.
Scary Spice. Liked to wear horn-styled hair alot. Big mouth. Had a baby with Eddie Murphy. Had. sex. with. Eddie. Murphy. The man is funny, but when he laughs he sounds and looks like a horse. Every inch of his face looks like trying to run away from his teeth. The poor baby is going to inherit the Scary Spice scary, and the just plain SCARY.
Baby Spice. Lollipop-licking 40 year old in vagina-high babydoll dresses. I'm not sure how that reflects feminsim, but I'm pretty sure that a lot of paedophiles joined agreed with the "girls can do things tooo!" -power train.
Posh Spice: STEPFORD WIFE STEPFORD WIFE PUMPS OUT THREE BABIES STILL LOOKS LIKE A ROBOT. And since we're speaking movie references I'll just mention how much I'd rather see her in the Little Shop of Horrors. Either as Audrey Jr or as Dr. Farb. Either would be just as satisfying. Well, maybe not the second, there's nothing left of her as it is. It would take like a minute or something. What an anti-climax.
Sporty Spice. I don't remember which one this was. I remember the name because of the archetypes presented in this wonderful line-up: rebel, frigid, daddy's girl, ho. There must have been a sporty tomboy representative as well. Unless I am sadly mistaken and it was lawyer. Did I forget the lawyer? There's an optimist I me yet, I tell you. Brain Surgeon Spice, removes your tumor with pinkie nails alone, it's amazing.
Sexy Spice: I actually remember her doing a song after the Spice Girls parted - one where she danced around in hot little gym tights. During the time that she got into gym tights, her not being able to decide between being morbidly fat and a bone. I can't remember what the song was, but I get warm fuzzy feeling in my general crotch area when I think about the video. No I lie, I can't really remember the video either.
And my crotch just has the rot. It's that time of the month again, so forgive me if I'm not that nice. Or if instead of laughing my eyes go deer-in-headlight (venison-tomorrow!) wide when you say "Smell you later!"
Well I for one remember the Spice girls. Not for their songs though, but for other random nonsense - something which seems to sum up the entire affair.
Scary Spice. Liked to wear horn-styled hair alot. Big mouth. Had a baby with Eddie Murphy. Had. sex. with. Eddie. Murphy. The man is funny, but when he laughs he sounds and looks like a horse. Every inch of his face looks like trying to run away from his teeth. The poor baby is going to inherit the Scary Spice scary, and the just plain SCARY.
Baby Spice. Lollipop-licking 40 year old in vagina-high babydoll dresses. I'm not sure how that reflects feminsim, but I'm pretty sure that a lot of paedophiles joined agreed with the "girls can do things tooo!" -power train.
Posh Spice: STEPFORD WIFE STEPFORD WIFE PUMPS OUT THREE BABIES STILL LOOKS LIKE A ROBOT. And since we're speaking movie references I'll just mention how much I'd rather see her in the Little Shop of Horrors. Either as Audrey Jr or as Dr. Farb. Either would be just as satisfying. Well, maybe not the second, there's nothing left of her as it is. It would take like a minute or something. What an anti-climax.
Sporty Spice. I don't remember which one this was. I remember the name because of the archetypes presented in this wonderful line-up: rebel, frigid, daddy's girl, ho. There must have been a sporty tomboy representative as well. Unless I am sadly mistaken and it was lawyer. Did I forget the lawyer? There's an optimist I me yet, I tell you. Brain Surgeon Spice, removes your tumor with pinkie nails alone, it's amazing.
Sexy Spice: I actually remember her doing a song after the Spice Girls parted - one where she danced around in hot little gym tights. During the time that she got into gym tights, her not being able to decide between being morbidly fat and a bone. I can't remember what the song was, but I get warm fuzzy feeling in my general crotch area when I think about the video. No I lie, I can't really remember the video either.
And my crotch just has the rot. It's that time of the month again, so forgive me if I'm not that nice. Or if instead of laughing my eyes go deer-in-headlight (venison-tomorrow!) wide when you say "Smell you later!"
